Meltdowns in my mundane Saturday morning...

Hazy view of my ceiling, I turn around covering myself inside the quilt making myself very cozy. My alarm beeps. I just reach out and snooze that out. Just cover my head with the quilt. after 10 min... Alarm beeps again.

Just take a quick glance again! Its time for me to get ready to my work.
Wake up, go to the mirror and wash my face, brush my teeth. lazily...
Come and iron my shirt... Just go down to kitchen and cook something to eat before i leave for work, Its morning 6 am.

Improvising my breakfast with whats available..., Just eggs on tortillas, or chappathis or rice with yogurt.. Something to fill my stomach... Just go to my pc, as I have some more minutes... I check mails, read my fav blogs. Read the scripture....

I just sit there.... Everyone of my friends sleeping..... I m there in my room... Just that moment.. Hey God Father, I m up,.... all by me, here.... My God,Father, What do you think?

Get myself dressed, take my wallet,shop keys and my walkman. Get out of my house...
Misty morning... 2 or three people walking.... In the road, have old guys walking ... Newspaper bundle dropped in my nearby shop.
I just put my headphones and I walk like a rampwalk model as stylishly as I could, no one to look at me...

The music starts... in my headphones. Gently and humming sound of the singers.... Like the whole morning is filled with the music. I hear this song... . Its like the whole universe singing

"We are a moment, You are forever,
Lord of the Ages, God before time
We are a vapor, You are eternal
Lord everlasting, reigning on high"

My heart getting sober, thinking of my God, His matchless wonder...... My soul and my body... in awe of ... MY GOD, EL ELOHI, MY MOST HIGH GOD! and my reality ' vapor like existence'.

In full sound, like cries of sincere hearts, the song goes on.... to the chorus...

"Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty,
Worthy is the lamb who was slain"

My eyes becoming wet and tears flowing from it... My hands lifting itself, me stopping my walk and looking the heavens...

"Highest praises,honor and glory
Be unto your name, Be unto your name"

My heart meltdowns...
Hey My dear PAPA, FATHER , You are AWESOME, I adore you, PAPA... I wanna join the angels all eternity singing praises to you, PAPA FATHER...

The song continues.... Someone passed by me... I just wiped my tears ... Kept on walking... I say to myself.
The song goes on...

"We are the broken, You are the healer
Jesus Redeemer, Mighty to save
You are the love song we ll sing forever
Bowing before you, blessing your name"

Eyes becoming wet again, Another meltdown..

walking in the street no one is there in the misty morning, lifting my hands and crying the chorus

"Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty,
Worthy is the lamb who was slain"
"Highest praises,honor and glory
Be unto your name, Be unto your name"

Reached my workplace, started my work.....

thinking...." Dear PapaLord, that is really a meltdown, give me more of this, let my life become full of these moments, Because this is the true reaction for anyone who realises Who YOU are, what we are, who cannot but cry praising You"

'What I do in the secret' matters!

The first advice, Jesus gave "When you pray,Go into your secret closet". I just want to pause there.....Why should I go into the Secret Closet?.... Hey wait.....................................................
What is a secret? One that you only know with no one else knowing.

I m wondering of the divine intent behind this advice.... Do you wonder why? Lets think...

When I seriously thought, I find 'What I do in the secret' must the true being of me.First and foremost, before prayer, God seeks truth in the prayer I make. He doesnt want what I want to be asked in front of other people. Because, I might be trying to impress or trying to show my knowledge and godliness to others. But He wants my true being to talk to Him. What I pray,it should come from my true being, without any manipulation and contrivations and motivations other than communicating with the Father in Heaven.

Many times, People can feign Godliness on the outside. But God is not impressed by it. He goes to their secret place, What He finds there ,is the truth of their character.

Imagine, I come to fellowship pray and share encouraging scriptures have wonderful time, then I go to my room. Lock the door. There me all by myself. What do I do there all alone?.......That shows God what I am. That shows my motives. If I do pray very concernedly for someone who is having a problem in their lifewithout them knowing, without any desire for appreciation or acknowledgement. That is purity in motives! That is prayer!

Many people pray infront of people for them, but in their mind they just do it out of necessity or out of duty. Their heart is switched off. Its routine act in display there. Its not genuine. We could pray for some people and in our minds n hearts couldnt even feel a thing of what they are going through. Do you think God will be impressed by that prayer?

Jesus way of seeing us is totally different from what we christians see, He sees the motive behind it. Not the outer act, the underlying motive.

I think, What I do in the secret shows the underlying motive.

When we give alms, Jesus tells dont let the left hand know what your left hand does. Then Jesus says, The Father will see what you do in secret and reward you openly.

I find many scripture where Jesus says, What do you do in secret as the test of our purity in motives. This thought really shows how short I fall to God's standard. It shows exactly what I am in my heart.

O God, When I spend time with you in prayer. Make my motives pure and my intentions divine, Yes, I drastically fall short of your standard. Let my secret closets be washed and purified. Let You become the Lord of my secret closet too! Amen

Principle: What you do in secret, will be rewarded openly

Lets discuss about Prayer!

Its Sunday Church Yesterday, My Pastor, Gary spoke on 'Prayer'. He made perfect sense. I was really made to see how much I can get if my eyes are open and my heart willing to receive the teaching of my pastor. I loved it when I heard it.

Many times, I find myself going in search for formulas and patterns to approach God, assuming that He is not of aware of me makin it up. I thought I have to start my prayer in such a way and end in such a way. I have to use some words just for the sake of it. But what I realised is, That makes me to go to prayer in a religious manner. And since its done out of duty, it doesnt connect with God but was reduced to a routine ritual. So sometimes I lose interest in it. It is not what God intended right?

So, Here we are starting a discussion on 'Prayer'( Personal Prayer):

To start with, We ll kick off with Matthew 6

The chapter Matthew 6( in message translation) was an awesome truth.

⁵"And when you come before God, don't turn that into a theatrical production either. All these people making a regular show out of their prayers, hoping for stardom! Do you think God sits in a box seat? ⁶"Here's what I want you to do: Find a quiet, secluded place so you won't be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace. ⁷"The world is full of so-called prayer warriors who are prayer-ignorant. They're full of formulas and programs and advice, peddling techniques for getting what you want from God. ⁸Don't fall for that nonsense. This is your Father you are dealing with, and he knows better than you what you need. ⁹With a God like this loving you, you can pray very simply.

Come on! Lets try to help each other in understanding the prayer!

Jesus, Bless this discussion, we wanna truly connect to you, as the disciples asked you, we pray 'Master, Teach us to pray!"

FACTS About Prayer

1. All men of faith in the bible, all superstars of the bible were men of prayer. They are prayer warriors of the God kind.
2. One thought to think on: Jesus, the Son of God, never ever treated prayer lightly. That shows how much should we be into prayer?
   

Love the bible talks about.

The meaning of love is so distorted in the english language that people use it for so many things. They say, they love God and their dog too. The meaning of the word,'love' when we read bible is diminished as we are conditioned by hearing in this way. But do you see, that the word love has the same meaning as we imagine in our mind?

Do you wonder: What is the love the bible talks about?

Lets dig in.

In Greek, the original language of our new testament, we have 4 words which are translated into 'love' in english. Yeah, for all these 4 words , our english language has only one word 'love'. But in greek, they have 4 different meanings. Are you wondering what are they? Interesting, isnt it?

1 st word translated as love in english: 'Storge'
Its meaning: It is parental love ;affection parents have on their children.

2nd word translated as love in english: 'Eros'
Its meaning: It is sexual love.

3rd word translated as love in english: 'Philia'
Its meaning: It is friendly love; brotherly affection

4th word translated as love in english: 'Agape'
Its meaning: It is the purest form of love; Its unconditional, selfless ,sacrificial love; without any reservations; It is this love that all the verses relating to God's love in new testament speaks about.

It is this kind of love that God commands us to have towards Him and our neighbors.

Do you think how come we can show that pure selfless sacrificial love?
Never without Jesus helping us!

Jesus, We want to 'Love(agape)' You! Teach us to 'love(agape)' You! (in the truest meaning of love) Help us!
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Note:
Do you want to go and look for yourself the root word for the 'love' verses in the bible?
Here is the way,
1. Go to www.blueletterbible.org
2.Type in the verse you want to see, for example, Matthew 22:37 or 1 John 4:10
3. You ll find near the start of the verse, alphabets K,C,L,V,D.
4. Click C; It stands for Hebrew/Greek Lexicon
5. You could see the greek root word for each part of the verse
6. The 'love' part of the verse will have 'agape' in its root.

What is the goal of the instruction that we receive from the bible?

I lived never wondering about this question, but recently while reading scripture in a random day, a revelation came. Why the instruction was given? What is the goal of it?

Recently, One verse from the book of 1 Timothy, changed my total outlook on the Bible and Christianity. I read my New American Standard Version Bible. Just see this verse, my friend, in that version.

1 Timothy 1:5

"The goal of our instruction is LOVE from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith"

Just repeat it, my friend. Allow it to sink it down. The goal, the final product of the instruction that is expected of us those who read it is given by this verse. The goal is not you becoming the richest of richest, you getting all the powers, you enjoying all the pleasure...etc..See what God really needs from us, is love which is basically springing from a pure heart, a good conscience and a sincere faith.

The bible 's goal is to make us loving, not from a impure heart, or a bad conscience and an insincere faith. I see thats the reason for all the hypocritism in Christianity. They say they love but basically the base from which their love should come forth is distorted, they have a bad conscience, a faith that is manipulated and a heart that is impure.

But see the combination from which the God demanded that love should spring! A pure heart, A clear and clean heart! A good conscience! Not a conscience which is full of guilt and darkness! A sincere faith! Faith which is not only to get all the blessings from God like money n riches but committed to the Kingdom of God ready to give everything for Him!

Imagine you becoming like that! 'pure' hearted, conscience 'fullness of goodness', faith 'sincere'. Imagine my friend, What a state to be? And Love springs, oozes and overflows from that state!
How pure! How good! How Sincere!
Oh, that is. That is....
That is the goal of the instruction (The Bible)!
(from 1 timothy 1:5)

Did you wonder of the purpose of my blog, Lord?

My Dear God,
This blog of mine has one purpose. For me and those who read it, I have one prayer
"Let it be that our love for You deepens, our passion for You becomes stronger and our faith becomes sincere"
All I have here is words from a simple life with all the love I can muster from being with you.
I just want to follow you through all the struggles, pains and suffering, through all the joys, laughter and happy moments. And more than believing, loving you as real as I could. I wonder if You are pleased, Speak to me, Lord. Let my life become an offering!

'God hugs' in my ordinary mundane life!

Sunday,I started work in my waterloo station, serving customers. Had an elderly couple with a kiwi accent asking my help. I tried helping them. The wife was very bubbly n was conversing with me while the husband was a bit reserved. As a part of my job, I did as much as I could. They were pleased. Then I wished them ' Thank you, Enjoy your journey' . The husband looked back at me n said, "Hey Son, come to New Zealand, I will take care of you!". I stood there wondering!

Simple incident, Pure Delight! { felt as if God hugged me!}

Monday, I went to college. Had a break for one hour. Did nt carry my wallet to college. Felt hungry n thought, oh,I m gonna starve. Decided to just stay in the classroom reading a book. Classmates, Who I havent spoken with n chatted with, saw me not going for break. They just put their food in a box, with a new fork n placed in front of me. I said,'no mate! I m not hungry'. They just insisted n forced me to eat even after i refused. Its not the food that filled me, but the affection they showered to the unknown guy {me} there .

Again Simple incident, Pure Delight! {Again felt the warmth of Him, hugging me}

Sometimes, I become so bothered by the little big hurts I have on the day, forgetting ' God hugs' like these. I find when I focus on hurts, I become upset. But When I focus on pleasant incidents like this, I feel lifted and safe in His hands.Then, I decided. Yeah, I ll bid Adieu to the little big hurts! n I m gonna treasure 'God hugs' , the simple graces of God like these.

I m not going to wait for a big-scale miracle to rejoice! I will celebrate each n every little pleasant thing My God does! By choice! Every Perfect Gift is from Above! I see Him patting on my back, encouraging and smiling in my very ordinary mundane life thro' these 'God Hugs'

I love it! I ll celebrate it! Hehe! My God hugs me! Hehe! HaHa!
I m madly in love with Him!

Convicted: One more time!

From my mouth came these words, "He is always like that. I dont want to take anymore of this. Its done deal....... ..." . I had my friend's actions make me too disturbed recently. I was upset and was blurting things out "I never want to be treated like this ....If he treats us like that then Whats the point in being friends with him?.... No Use..." I lost my peace when I did that. I was really planning not to work on that friendship again. I didnt realise what I was doing.

Later, after a couple of days, I found my another friend getting irritated over his pal over a different issue. In short, He just used the same lines that I used while talking to me. As I watched my friend getting upset, and speaking out, one single impulse of thought sparked in my mind, my silence was disturbed.

I blurted the thought out to him, " If God gets upset n gives up on me so quickly like that, How pitiable I ll be?". That one line silenced my friend. (And me too)

I was really shaken inside, as it was as if I was struck by a rod . One more time again to my long list, I was convicted! I believe I was chastened by that incident. I mulled it over. How true? Oh, How wrong I ve been quick to give a judgement sentence on people? If God so quickly gives judgement, I ll never have hope. Who I am to judge and pass opinions? I felt ashamed of what I did in that quick act of judgement. How patient and longsuffering has God been with me? How many chances has He given me? Countless times. ....God, You were too good for me.

I ll become longsuffering like my God, I ll become patient like my God. If my God endures so much, I should endure atleast a fraction. As I live, I ll work on relationships without giving up on people and without judging people because of their actions,lifestyle, behaviour and comments as God gives me the strength.

My sweet Jesus, Work on me! Give me the strength to forgive and love! Forgive me too. Jesus, endow me with that resolute love and passion You had! My loving Jesus, I depend totally on you to change me! Change me!

This article is so true! Be Inspired!

Friends, I came across this article by Jack Klumpenhower. Really Inspiring!

The Man Who Wouldn’t Speak

“That’s not what I meant,” I recently insisted to a colleague. He’d accused me of ignoring his side in a business matter, and I hopped to my own defense. I wanted to correct him and protect my reputation. But why? Thinking about it now, I realize how quick I usually am to defend myself.

Jesus is so different. Often in the Bible, he accepts personal attacks without any defense. The night before his death, on trial before the high priest, Jesus listened to witness after witness give false testimony about him.

The high priest stood up before the others and asked Jesus, “Well, aren’t you going to answer these charges? What do you have to say for yourself?” But Jesus was silent and made no reply. Then the high priest asked him, “Are you the Messiah, the Son of the Blessed One?”
Jesus said, “I AM. And you will see the Son of Man seated in the place of power at God’s right hand and coming on the clouds of heaven.” (Mark 14:60-62, NLT)

The high priest got angry, had Jesus beaten, and pronounced a death sentence.

How Jesus speaks

The story leaves me with two questions:

1. How could Jesus listen to so many lies without defending himself? I couldn’t do that.
2. How could he finally answer one question with such a brave burst of truth? I’d be too scared.

Perhaps both questions have the same answer: Jesus knows who he is in relationship with God. He knows he’s God’s Son. Look how he uses the divine name “I AM,” and Old Testament imagery of God’s king riding the clouds.

The reason Jesus doesn’t defend himself is because he doesn’t need other people to approve of him. He knows God approves of him. Who he is with God powers his life. It’s his only comfort and his greatest thrill. And it fills him so completely that, when poked by the high priest’s question, who-he-is-with-God erupts out of him. In one sentence, Jesus speaks more truth than all the testimony that came before.

How I speak

I’m still the opposite. I’m eager to defend myself but likely to duck out of telling the truth about God. I don’t have the willpower to change this.

But I have one place to turn. Jesus, who spoke so well, has given his Spirit to teach my heart—to teach me who I am with God. I am God’s adopted son. I belong to Jesus, who suffered that beating and death so that I may one day meet him when he comes on the clouds. Teach me, Lord, that I need no other approval, no self-defense, and no better name to speak.

Jack Klumpenhower is a writer living in Winston-Salem, North Carolina

A Lesson from Ammu & Appu

Recently I had my Vigi Akka bring her kids to my house. Their names are Appu and Ammu. They are so cute and I just love and adore them. I started playing with them in my room. Akka and Uncle went out to buy something. They know that Ammu and Appu are playing with me. We were playing, chatting and having all the fun. When Akka came back, they were coming to my room, calling " Ammu and Appu, where are you?".

Playfully, Ammu and Appu, hid themselves behind the suitcases I had in the room. Uncle came into my room saw them doing this and he understood what they are doing and said, "Where are they, I could nt see them?" I said, " No , I dont know".

Uncle just went out and said one line, " Okay, Lets go".
Thats all, Ammu and Appu ran out of their hiding places shouting, "Daddy , I was there hiding, Mummy, I m here, Didnt you see me?"

The quick and sudden rush with which they ran and shouted " Daddy, I m here", really made me to ponder...

I want to be like them. Whenever I feel dry and seem to lose sight of God, I want to rush to God with that hurry, "Daddy, I m here, never leave me, dont take your Spirit from me. I never want to be without you".

Dear Ammu & Appu,I love you two. You taught me a lesson!

In YOUR Life: WHO matters the most?

Recently, I had an intimate friend who had dear loving parents say to me that his parents forsook him, being afraid of the society to deliver him out of the tough situation he's going through.

He cried to me over the phone,' I cant even trust my mother and father, whom I loved and trusted all the more, If they let me in this tough situation helpless, WHERE LL I GO? WHO IS THERE to help me? My Life looks meaningless'.

Imagine, When you are in a situation like that? ALL who you trusted, seem to let you down. It is really painful to know in deathbed or in time of uttermost pain n suffering, that those who we have trusted have given up on us. Countless times, Dont we ask these questions to ourselves..Do I mean anything to anyone? Can I find ONE trustworthy person in this universe, Who can I entrust my life n being?

YES! You can! Dont think you are worthless for You are so Precious to Him. He is trustworthy than anyone else. For He is the UNchanging One. You can Trust on Him, no matter what happens! The'HE' is JESUS.

You are considered so precious, that the Son of God, JESUS forsook the heaven, gave up His Crown and Glory, came to this world, lived a sinless life. Yet for your sins n mine, was beaten to death, stripped of His clothes, whipped to tear his skins off with lashes ,crowned with thorns, ridiculed and shamed by His own people, made to carry the cross, nailed to cross, half naked and died.He rose again just to live with me and you.

Why did He do this all?Just to prove in word and deed that
"HE LOVES YOU WITH AN EVERLASTING LOVE"He paid the price for my sins and yours, Now We are guiltfree!He rose again, He lives n says to you, "I will never leave you nor forsake you" He says," I have plans to prosper me and give me a future"
WOW! What an AWESOME GOD? No one showed me the meaning of Love like Him. He showed it in His LIFE AND DEATH. Is nt it true, that my GOD IS LOVE?
What more can I ask ?HE GAVE IT ALL for ME! Literally everything, every inch of His being,His life and death. All for me!

JESUS! YOU should MATTER to me THE MOST! I find it rare to see anyone leaving their building to see me. YOU left Heavens for me. I ve got friends to pay for a meal, but YOU paid for all my ugly sins. I ve not found anyone trustworthy,Unchanging whom I can depend on, Yet You,JESUS, the UNCHANGING one, before I could believe, You did it all on the cross.

WHO is there like you? Who in the world can match YOUR Love?
Jesus, What made You to do so much for me?
Your Love shocks me! I 'm all the more stunned,Jesus!

Out of this life, I dont want fame, recognition or honor, I dont want money, power or wealth. I dont want meaningless relations,pleasures or entertainment. I dont want anything that the world offers to steal me from you. BUT I NEED YOU, JESUS!
JESUS, MAKE ME YOURS! SEAL ME for YOU!BRAND ME for YOU!

The world manipulates, uses and abuses me. Let not the world fool me, Let my all be to YOU! I dont want anything but YOU! I want to know YOU more! Love YOU more with your kind of LOVE! Teach me,How to LOVE YOU?

MY MISSION in LIFE is to BE WITH YOU!You know my past, my present and my future. Lord, If you find me going away from you, take me now itself.What's the point of living,'If I dont live with You'?IF I live, I should be with you or Take me now itself JESUS, This soul,mind, body and the breath belongs to YOU!MAKE ME YOURS ONLY! Let my SELF die n YOU live in me!

Lord,This is my Prayer!